Discovering the Woman You Call Mom 1

Dedicated to My Mom

Women have raised the bar in our world. My family’s origin of women were generally very strong and amazing and I am blessed to be a part of their lineage. To know that I am carrying on their tradition of vitality cues the song “I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar!”

As far back as I can think, my grandmother and mom were the powerhouses and mentors in my life. With great sadness, I unexpectedly lost my mom the day before Valentine’s Day. My world has definitely been crushed, but I am going to continue celebrating her life.

Monica Helpman: My mom, the woman I looked up to. I truly hope you have and always will have someone you look up to as much as I did. Who are your role models? I say “models” because you can have many—your mom, grandmother, aunts, teachers or any woman who has helped shape you and your life. When you think about who you really are, which amazing woman has helped you realize you are amazing? If you’re not sure, you might want to reflect for a moment about your past and your self-identity. Have you ever done this?

Are you who you think you were meant to be? Is your life where you think it should be? If it’s not, I invite you to “take the bull by the horns” and make it your best possible life. Why would you short yourself or give yourself anything else?

There might be a few reasons you are not giving yourself the love that you deserve. One being that you don’t love yourself or think you should love yourself. Maybe you don’t feel you deserve it or are worthy of it. Well I’m here to remind you that not only do you deserve it, but we all do.

We must honor our own journeys, as well as the women around us. We need to be each other’s cheerleaders to encourage and lift each other up, creating a universal support group. I started a women’s support group a few years ago to enhance each of us and the beautiful gifts that we all possess as women and to let women know we are not alone.

My mother was also my inspiration for the support group. When she was raising us, her children, she was very busy, helping out on every committee, like many of us. My mom had a very full life with lots of friends. She volunteered at our school, dinner parties and worked while still taking great care of her family. On top of all of this, our home was decorated nicely, always clean and in order. It was a happy home. A place that I enjoyed coming home to and where my friends always wanted to be. My mom welcomed everyone. If it was going to rain, there was always a pot of soup to warm us up. My mom always dressed beautifully. My mom worked in several careers, one being a stylist for the studios like myself, but she always made time for her kids and friends.

After her kids got older, she began to find herself alone more. It got harder to meet friends. My mom told me to start making friends before my kids got too old as it would just get harder and harder to make new connections. She taught me to stand up for myself and to be my own cheerleader. She was never prejudiced toward anything or anyone, other than thinking her kids were the best. She taught us that if you work hard, you will get rewarded. She taught us to have traditions and regularities. She taught us to spend money on ourselves, because “when you look good, you feel good.”

She taught us to be a team player, and that we are never too old to learn. She taught me to keep filling my mind with great, positive information. My mom taught me about unconditional love as a mother. Of course, we have faced difficult times as a family, but she was a mom that never gave up and was always able to give us another chance.

I hope that you all have someone who you look up to like I did and forever will. For everyone that still has their moms, cherish every moment as you never know when that day will come.

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